Ok....first off....Leigh did poo on the toilet tonight and tried to wipe his own bottom!! This is pretty much the most exciting thing that has happened in our house for a while! Now, he has been weeing on the loo for a good couple of weeks which is great, but trying to convince him that the toilet is a perfectly good place to be doing poo is another story!
Until I bribed him....with food. Not my finest Mummy moment. But it worked. Now he's going to want a YumYum Ball everytime he does a poo...oops!
Apart from that I am feeling incredibly guilty about Zack's birthday cake. He had his little heart set on a Lego man cake. And I had my heart set on making it. Part of being a Mummy to little people is making incredible, increasingly difficult, homemade cakes. Cakes that light up their whole face when they finally lay eyes on it. Cakes that are looked forward to every year. Cakes that I stay up till 2am perfecting and thoroughly enjoying every minute of it. Cakes you don't want to cut up but you truly don't mind if the recipient goes to town with their fingers.
Not this year. Not for my big boys 5th birthday. No, this year our baby girl has Leukaemia. This year I could very well be in hospital with her. Stupid Leukaemia.
I know in the whole scheme of things this is such a little thing. Not really a big deal. He'll have a great birthday regardless of where the cake comes from. As long as we are all together. I should be grateful Evie is doing so well. I am.
Still upsets me though. Still makes us realise that it kinda feels like our life is on hold even though this is our life right now. Still makes me feel like I'm missing out on the simple things, the little things. I can't remember the last time I took the kids to the park. I can't remember the last time I sat and had a baby chino with them. I can't remember the last time I spent a day alone with my three babies. And right now I feel like crying. I miss being a stay at home mum. I know I still am. But it is so far from the same it's just not funny.
Anyway, I am completely off track and rambling! So, here I am feeling guilty about Zack's cake. I decide I will chat to him about. After I look into his completely disappointed eyes, we get online and search for a bought cake that might come even vaguely close to the homemade image we both had in mind.
Ta-da...we come across Ferguson Plarre. And by some miracle they have cakes on which you can put any image your little heart desires. So we head off to the Lego website and hunt around. We end up with a great looking cake that Zack is super excited about and I am feeling a tiny bit less guilty about.
This Mummy gig is tough. But oh so worth it. I love my babies.....even when I walk into their bedroom to find and entire bottle of water over the floor......squirted in a fit of giggles off the top bunk. I send them both outside.....while I have a good laugh and decide I'm not going to punish them. I know they know they shouldn't have done it...but sometimes, when you're little(and even when your big) you just get carried away. Bad mummy moment?? Nah.